As we sit still and quiet, with nothing to distract us from our train of thought, we might hear something like this: "My nose itches. Am I allowed to scratch it? Why not?! I should be. What's the big deal? I feel trapped by this meditation. Having to sit. It hurts my back.  I'm angry. I have a ton of things to get done and what is this doing for me?  Nothing. What a waste of time. Why is that person breathing so loud? It's so distracting. I want peace and quiet. My jaw is tight. Gosh, I didn't know I was clenching it." These thoughts might reveal a perception of being trapped in situations in life and a resulting resentment. They speak of impatience and possibly feeling that other people are responsible for making oneself feel peaceful. Finally, there is a realization that these attitudes of resentment, impatience, and expectations of others cause tension in the body. Through meditation, we can begin to observe the obstacles to our inner peace,

   Once we become honest observers of ourselves, we not only can see clearly what thoughts are arising in any given moment, but we recognize that, much of the time, these thoughts are causing us (and others) suffering. The mind can certainly be used in very productive ways, like when we are calculating a payment, listening to someone, or writing an essay. But most of the time we're not in such focused work, and an undisciplined mind, just like an undisciplined toddler, runs wild and gets us into trouble.

   The next step is undoubtedly the most difficult - creating change in our consciousness. How do we develop a more peaceful mind when we're filled with these thoughts? Begin by seeing them as they are - only thoughts. These ideas that arise in our head are thoughts, not reality. However, the majority of the time we react to them as if they were real. We may begin to treat the person we thought was breathing loudly with disdain, because we judged that not only was their breathing loud, but it was a problem - they were a problem. We may distance ourselves from him or her, or even treat them badly, because of our reactions about their breath!  Yet the truth is, it was simply a person breathing. Whether or not it is a problem is up to us, not the person breathing.

   In the Yoga Sutras, the author, Patanjali, informs us that if we do not free ourselves from these fluctuations of mind, we then identify ourselves with them.  We become at the whim of the rise and fall of our emotions.  We are blown about by annoyances, misinterpretations, projections.  We lose our center and become the victims of circumstance.

   Our reaction to what arises in life determines whether the "heavy breather" becomes a non-issue or something that ruins our day. If we believe our thoughts, we could easily go about our lives reacting to everything. But if we start to reality-check and notice, "hey, that's just a thought - what if I decided to pay attention to something else rather than dwell on their breath?", we find that it fades into the background.

   Learning to question the reality of our thoughts, we can undertake the next practice: considering what to replace them with. In the beginning, it may be helpful to use something as simple as affirmations. If we are having a thought,"I will never be able to do all this work", we can replace it with a positive statement that supports us in the result we'd like: "I am able to finish my work in a timely manner." Although we may not always believe these affirmations at first, consider this: why is it so much easier to believe the negative statement than the positive? Even if we've had a history of having difficulty with our work, it is possible that we've had those problems because we have consistently believed the thoughts that say we aren't capable.

   Again, Patanjali’s wisdom shines through the ages to offer a similar suggestion.  In the 33rd verse of the second chapter of the Sutras, he states that in order to repell “unwholesome deliberations” – negative thoughts, reactions, attitudes – that one should cultivate their opposite.  Not just filling in a positive affirmation when there is a negative belief, but practicing feeling, behaving, thinking, and speaking in a manner aligned with the positive response to that negativity. 

   Patanjali gives several examples of the practice of replacing the negative with the positive.  If our negativity stems from a feeling of dissatisfaction with everything, by practicing appreciation of whatever comes to us and allowing ourselves to feel content with what good we already have in our lives, we begin to experience happiness.  This is the practice of Aparigraha, "non-greed".  Many of us are plagued by anger, judgement, or the impulse to lash out, which arises often out of fear.  These are harming energies to both ourselves and others.  To free ourselves from this detrimental state, we practice non-violence in thought, word, and deed, to ourselves and others.  This is not just to refrain from hurting another, but to fully embrace kindness, love, and compassion for all beings. When we become free from thoughts, words, or deeds that are harming, all interactions become harmonious.   This is the practice of Ahimsa, "non-violence", in its highest sense.  When we fully embody those qualities, all tensions and enmity dissolve around us.  People (and even animals) naturally feel safe in our presence and want to be around us.

   This can be applied to any aspect of our lives.  If you feel anger towards a coworker and you want to be freed from that, consider what the opposite would be.  If you’re unable to feel love for them, can you feel compassion for what they may be experiencing that causes them to act in ways that anger you?  Can you then extend that practice to wishing that they are free from their pain and suffering?  Perhaps you can then sense a feeling of connection with that person – that all of us, at one time or another, experience suffering.  Then we may be able to extend the wish that both you and that other person are happy.  If that other person becomes happy and friendly, wouldn’t you probably like them more?  This may eventually lead to the ability to express kindness or even love to that other person.  When we do this, we naturally begin to feel happier and more loving within.

   If the problem is loneliness, the opposite quality might be a feeling of connection.  Then our practice would be to look for how we connect to others.  What do I share with this other person next to me in the grocery aisle?  Are we not both human, and both wish for happiness and well-being?  As we talk with someone, we can seek the place in our hearts that feels a kinship to others and express it through our words and actions.  When we are by ourselves, we can take a walk through nature to get feel our interrelatedness with all living things.  As we are more and more open to connecting to others, people respond to that and want to be around us.

   In the beginning, this may seem too difficult to do.  We often have expectations that our efforts should create instant results.  Many of us tend to give up when something we desire requires extended effort.  Yet again, the father of modern-day yoga philosophy reminds us that the two most important keys to success in the practice (particularly the practice of finding the quiet, peaceful place beyond these fluctuations of mind) are Non-Attachment (Viaraagya)  and steady, unrelenting Practice (Abhyaasa).

    Non-Attachment and Practice.  We need to keep doing the right thing, regardless of whether we get instant results or not, regardless of whether we feel immediately better or if it is easy or difficult.  We must persist without expectation of particular outcomes, being unattached and open to the process.  If we cling to a certain result, we again become ensnared in the demands, worries, frustrations, and judgments of the fluctuating mind.  Step back, observe without reacting, and continue to practice.

   Over time, in the process of self-observation, reality-checking, non-attachment, and changing the negative into the positive, we begin to experience more calm, joy, and contentment.  Through these practices, we plant the inner seeds of peace and they begin to grow.  Peace becomes our internal state.  Peaceful minds lead to peaceful words and actions, which then affect others.  When each person takes on this kind of practice, peace can then grow in the world.  Ultimately, we can only be responsible for ourselves.  But each one of us can make a great impact on others by embodying love, compassion, and kindness.  This is our part in creating peace.

    Peace on Earth is possible.  Now.  It’s up to each of us.  It’s up to you.

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A Time of Rest   

     We're in the middle of winter now, and some of the more rational beings of this planet are hibernating at this time.  Why?  It's a time when most of nature is resting, restoring, and storing its energy for the new life that will be coming in Spring ... not far away at this point (at least here in California!). 

Copyright © 2002 - 2007 by Constance L. Habash

Spiritual Quotes

"Everybody can be great... because anybody can serve.  You don't have to have a college degree to serve.  You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve.  You only need a heart full of grace.  A soul generated by love." 
~ Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

"All you have shall some day be given; Therefore give now, that the season of giving may be yours and not your inheritors." 
~ Kahlil Gibran, "The Prophet"

"Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened.  Happiness never decreases by being shared." 
~ The Buddha