This Month's Article:

"Inner Immunity"
by Connie Habash

     Immunity is an integral aspect of our health and well-being.  It is an intricate, effective system in our physical bodies for identifying and eradicating foreign objects and organisms that maybe dangerous to us.  It starts from our skin and functions down to a cellular level.  It's truly miraculous how we are able, without even conscious knowledge, to be protected from the vast majority of bugs and toxins that we are exposed to.

     Unfortunately, there are other ways in which we are much more vulnerable.  While most of us have strong physical immunity, often times we have weak mental and emotional resistance. I think of this as inner immunity - our resistance and resilience in the face of mental and emotional toxins.

     Daily, we are inundated by words,images, sounds, and ideas that are unhealthy for our hearts and minds. TV, radio, printed media, and computers feed us news of all kinds of horrors,as well as attempt to persuade us to live certain kinds of lifestyles and fill our ears and eyes with gossip and grandiosity.  People we meet in the grocery store or on the roads may have bad attitudes that they try to dump off on us.  A boss may be critical or condescending, our partners may be grumpy or complaining, and our kids may make us feel like we're mean for taking away the internet privileges.  Some days, we barely notice the little jabs, and on others we may feel pretty beat up.

     Fortunately, it's not usually as bad as all that, and we have many things in life to enjoy and bring happiness.  Still, we all need to be able to fend off this negativity when it arises. Everyone needs strong inner immunity to prevent us from falling into the trap of taking in criticism, taking on anger, or getting absorbed in the drama of violence or obsessive materialism that unfolds in the media before us. We need something to keep all of it at bay, and keep our psyches relatively clean, healthy, and peaceful.

     How do we develop a good inner immunity?  Like with our own physical bodies, the key is to have multiple layers of defenses, and maintain their integrity.  If one should fail or fall short of keeping every intruder out, we'll have other resources at our disposal to dispose of negative thoughts and emotions.

     The body's first layer of defense is the skin itself.  It creates a semi-solid boundary between our more vulnerable innards and the world at large.  This is also essential for our inner defenses.  We've heard the phrase "he's thin-skinned",referring to someone who is too sensitive to what anyone says or does, and takes everything personally.   It can be helpful to be more "thick-skinned": put-downs bounce off a less permeable surface.  But what creates a thick skin?  Just as the skin is our boundary between the outer world and our insides, a thick skin is a clear boundary between knowing who you are and what anyone else tries to convince you of.  If someone calls you stupid and you know that you're smart, that comment will bounce off you like a clod of dirt off your arm.  It simply won't go in if you're clear about your true self.

    This isn't always easy to do, but if we practice staying clear within ourselves, it will naturally fend off the effects outside of us.  It helps to recognize and affirm for yourself that who you are is determined by your inner self, not what any influence says or does outside you.  Essentially, you are what you believe.  Nothing will enter into your mind and heart unless you already have a place that's receptive to that idea.

     For example, if someone said to you, "you're so orange!" you'd probably look at them as if they were nuts and the comment would easily slide off your skin (unless, I suppose, you bought a bad tube of self-tanning lotion).  There would not be anything in your psyche that responds to being orange, so it doesn't penetrate your inner skin.

     It's the comments like"idiot!" or "you're so selfish!" that may trigger a reaction, because some part of us may secretly wonder if perhaps we are.   If you firmly believe in your own innate intelligence or own essential goodness (not measured against any standard, and not expecting perfection),nothing will shake that, at least not for long.  Even if you had done something selfish, with a thick skin you'd be able to acknowledge your inappropriate behavior and rectify it without identifying yourself as a selfish person.  Your skin will keep that comment from sinking in and causing needless grief or sorrow. Recognize these kinds of comments as the worthless hot air that they usually are.

    Another outer layer of our defenses is the ability to tell what is healthy and what is not.  We don't eat food that smells bad.  We'll avoid touching our hands to our face when we've had them in the dirt or have been cleaning the bathroom.  This is a commonsense way of keeping oneself healthy that is innate in us.

     In our inner immunity, the yogic term for this would be viveka - discernment. We can use our ability to discern what is healthy for us from what is not and to make good choices. Just like choosing healthy food to eat, we can consciously be aware of the choices we make: what kind of television to watch or what people we feel right about hanging around. This can protect us from needlessly being exposed to experiences that may bring up worry, anger, or fear, disturbing our inner peace.  Most of us have probably experienced being tempted to watch a horrifying scene in a movie, only to be plagued by frightening images in our sleep. Discernment (viveka) tells us to stay away from things that will leave negative residue in our psyches.  It determines the best use of our time and energy, and what is healthy for our psyche and what isn't.  When we're choosing to take in only what supports well-being, inner peace, and our best qualities, then our hearts remain open and our minds stay clear.  It's a strong component of inner immunity.

     But what about those times when the outer defenses are breached?  The body's immune system has an elaborate response to invaders beneath the skin's surface.  It is enabled with the capability to seek out and identify intruders, and then destroy and/or dispose of them.  So our inner immunity similarly needs to have a protective response when a negative energy penetrates our thoughts and emotions.

     Often, we may find ourselves fearful,getting angry, or feeling down and not realizing how the train of thought started or why.  In the moment, we may not be aware of when we are affected by something, but find an hour later that we're in a sour mood.  In these instances,it takes practice to observe our thoughts and emotions, noticing when they arise. When we are aware of the processes happening in our minds, then we can choose to eradicate or at least redirect a negative thought or emotion rather than beat its effect.

     Our consciousness needs to first identify the thought occurring that is harmful.  Take, for example, the thought "I am a failure."  This may start out as feeling disappointed that a project didn't turn out quite the way we wished, and then it snow-balled into a negative belief, attached to an emotion, such as sadness.  It may have expanded from simple disappointment into thoughts about all the things in life that didn't work out the way we wanted, or envisioning things in the future that we imagine won't succeed.

     Our inner immune system needs to sound the alarms once we become aware of a negative chain reaction like this. In our body's immune system, once an invader has been identified, it is attacked or surrounded and either destroyed or sent out of the body with waste products.  We need to respond similarly to those negative thoughts! Identify these thoughts as something not-of-you:  they are thoughts, not your reality.  They can be changed,wiped out, or at least questioned once we become aware that they're occurring.

     Meditation is one powerful way of practicing this self-awareness and eliminating threats to our inner peace. Taking time out in the day to simply sit and be present, observing whatever arises,develops the awareness that allows us to stand up to the negative patterns which arise in the mind.  Once we become practiced at observing, then we can take action on what needs changing or cleaning out in our psyches.

     When we've identified a thought or emotion that's not serving us, we have a few choices as to how to become immune. We can observe it without attachment to it, imagining it floating by and disappearing like steam into the atmosphere.  We can laugh at it, knowing that we've caught that bug in the act of trying to disturb our peace. We can give it a reality check - just because something doesn't turn out the way we want one time doesn't reflect on who we are as a person and doesn't warrant a"failure" label. 

     Byron Katie, creator of "The Work",suggests inquiry: ask yourself thequestion, "is it true?"  In fact, she pushes us to look at whether it is absolutely, beyond the shadow of a doubt true.  In most instances (and in her opinion, every single one), you'll discover that you can't be so sure.  This also applies to judgments of others,which can be just as toxic as a judgment about yourself.  "He's wrong," when questioned in this way, is revealed as a perspective rather than fact. Moreover, it becomes a negative stance taken towards another that causes not only problems in the relationship but suffering within you.  If we consider that the other person may not be the way we perceive them, something in us opens and releases the stress that causes both mental and physical dis-ease.

     We can also cultivate the opposite quality or idea from the negative thought, image, or feeling.  This is a technique discussed in both Buddhist and Yogic philosophy.  Patanjali, the author of the Yoga Sutras, states that "for the repelling of unwholesome deliberation, the yogin should pursue the cultivation of the opposite." (YogaSutra II.33)  When our thoughts are not wholesome, we need to come up with something to concentrate the mind on that is uplifting, positive,healing.  There are many ways that we can cultivate an opposite: it may be conjuring images of light or of someone we love, singing a song that warms the heart, doing a kind or thoughtful act for another human being, shifting to a positive emotion, or practicing affirmations.

     For example, the cultivation of the opposite may be done through an act of kindness.  If we see disturbing things on the news of bad events that have happened to others, we may feel more hopeful about the world if we go out and help someone else in need.

     When the thought that someone may not like you distresses your heart, bring in the opposite quality by sitting down and remembering the times when someone showed their love and appreciation for you.  You could even pick up the phone and call someone who reminds you of how special you are to them!  Seek out evidence and support in your life of this opposite quality.

     Affirmations are positive self-statements that help us to build self-esteem and confidence and allow us to see the evidence of positive qualities and experiences.  For example, when the fear of failure arises, we can affirm ourselves positively: "I allow myself to see where I'm succeeding" or "every step I take leads towards greater fulfillment".  Choose something that feels authentic to you,rather than "pie in the sky" thinking. It may be easier to believe "I open to new experiences of happiness"than "I am totally happy and joyful". 

     The more we repeat these affirmations,the more they sink into our minds and hearts and we begin to feel their qualities within us.  Additionally, if we practice filling our mind with these positive statements, just like a mantra, it leaves little room or energy for negative ideas or emotions to arise.  It takes a while of consistent practice, and isn't always easy, but these statements powerfully build inner resiliency against unhealthy outer influences.

Copyright © 2005, 2010 by Connie Habash