Thanksgiving: a unique American holiday that is universal, unlimited by religion, race, or any category. It’s a special time to come together with family and friends to feel gratitude on this day of the celebration of abundance (oh yeah, and feasting!).
But for some of us, this isn’t an entirely pleasant holiday. We may be faced with “going home” to tension, crazy family dynamics, feeling ignored or attacked, possibly being the black sheep of the family. Perhaps you are hosting a large gathering, and stressed about pleasing everyone’s palates – or having everyone in your house! There may be a recent loss in the family that makes holidays, especially the most family-oriented one of the year, somewhat painful. Or we may be apart from our family, or feel that we don’t have one, and are faced with spending this holiday alone.
photo by laura musikanski
Last month, I explored the topic of “What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do” on my radio show, which has been a subject I’ve pondered for years and written articles about. But I’ve recently been impacted by the challenges of decision-making with my 12 year old daughter.
12 years old is a tough age. I don’t know about for boys, but for girls (and my daughter in particular), it’s a very bumpy ride. She’s been inundated by increasing demands at school, social pressures, and disappointments, not to mention the emotional roller-coaster of hormonal changes.
Perhaps all of this has contributed to her difficulty making decisions. She gets stuck in a frenzy of not knowing what to do. Smoke practically rises from her head when she’s not quite happy with either and feels she can’t choose. Her whole body tenses up, her face turns red, and nothing I say seems to make a difference. I wonder if she’ll blow a fuse.
Perhaps you sometimes feel like that? Like you’re damned if you do, and damned if you don’t, and don’t know which way to go? Continue Reading
February – a month that, stereotypically, we turn towards greeting cards with red and pink hearts, roses, chocolates, and are inundated with commercials about diamond jewelry. Valentine’s Day is around the corner, and whether it’s something you relish or are repulsed by, it’s here in our western culture.
I tend to avoid writing about this topic, but this year some new insights flowed in. Many of my clients and students struggle with the feeling of being lovable. This time of year can be triggering, causing some to feel lonely and lacking in romance. Others are disgusted at the commercial aspects, the commodification of love. And many of us continue to explore what is love, and what is the nature of our lovableness? Continue Reading
Whoa – with a title like “Your Destiny”, we’re all bound to give pause. We’ve probably all thought about our destiny at a few points in our lives. Is destiny pre-determined? Is it a well-defined path that we just plod along? Or do we have something to do with the unfolding of events in our lives?
Destiny is, in my opinion, a misunderstood word. We often associate it with the definition of “a pre-determined course of events.” Sometimes, destiny feels like that, as if things had to turn out a certain way, and there was nothing we could do about it.
But destiny is far more than just a fixed roller-coaster ride that you’re committed to and at the whim of as soon as you buckle up. No, destiny is a co-creation that has everything to do with your choices and your attention. Continue Reading
I remember back in college my Sociology teacher gave us an interesting assignment. For the next week, he told us, we needed to drive to and from our home by different routes each day. We were then to reflect on how the experience affected us.
Recently, I revisited this practice at my office, when my husband had taken my car for the day. This forced me to walk to lunch, rather than driving to one of my favorite spots.
Walking down a street that I usually drive down was a very different experience. Waiting at the crosswalk, ambling over to the other side of the street, and strolling along the roses growing next to the sidewalk was refreshing. It slowed me down and allowed me to actually see and appreciate what was around me. Continue Reading